Confidence is one of those rare commodities that successful people seem to have in spades.
And then there are people who are very low in self-belief who struggle to get anywhere in life.
As I considered how to get more confidence and better results, I wondered to myself, “What comes first?”
Do you need confidence to get results?
Or do you feel good about yourself because things have gone well for you?
And what if you lack both, so you don’t know where to start?
As I look at my own past, I can recall times when my confidence enabled me to achieve goals and times when my confidence was built by results that I saw in my life.
My confidence has enabled me to perform well in interviews, speak with passion in front of hundreds of people and build rapport with clients.
And every time I’ve done well in any of these circumstances, my self belief has gone up.
So what’s the answer?
Some will claim one or the other, but I suspect that both are true and they are intertwined.
That’s all well and good, but what if you lack confidence and struggle to get the results that you want from life?
Here are a couple of tips.
Fake it until you make it – I love this saying as it describes the process of building self-confidence. By modelling the body language of confident people, you can generate enough positive thoughts about yourself to get started.
When you feel low in confidence and have a big moment coming up, don’t sit there with your shoulders slumped, head down and arms crossed. Instead, lift your head, put your shoulders back, breathe deeply and perhaps even smile a bit. If it helps, try to recall a time when you were right on your game and let that memory build your confidence so that you can get out there and perform at an outstanding level. Build momentum slowly – If you’re looking for great outcomes in life but don’t have the poise to go after them yet, start smaller.
You may have 10 sales per day as a measure of success, and feel demoralised when you don’t reach it, so aim for one or two.
You may want to shoot 80 on the golf course and think that you’re useless if you can’t, so why not aim for 90 instead and feel good about your progress when you get there.
Set yourself small, achievable goals that you can build from. As you reach each target, celebrate your achievement and aim a little higher.
And as you see your results improve, you’ll notice that your confidence is rising as well.
Confidence and results.
They walk hand in hand.
If you have one, you’ll generally get the other and if you’re missing one, the other will be hiding as well. So don’t worry about what comes first and wish that it would magically appear, take action, get one and the other will follow
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